Category Archives: Uncategorized

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Depraved Indifference

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I want ALL of God’s heart. I want to hurt for His cause. I don’t want to suffer from depraved indifference. I want to be broken, and then I want to DO SOMETHING. It’s not enough to see the suffering and feel saddened. I don’t want to be blinded. I don’t want to forget. I want to be burdened by what breaks God’s heart. I want it to weigh upon me until I HAVE to do something. Watch this video. Are you willing to ask God to break your heart?

“Now you are the body of Christ, and each one of you is a part of it.” -1 Corinthians 12:27
“Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world.” -James 1:27

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Beanie Babies Take Flight

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I wanted to take a break from my story of transformation, to tell you the exciting things that are happening with my old Beanie Babies! I was one of those girls who was absolutely obsessed with Beanie Babies. I had to have them all. My mom would be at stores before they opened waiting for the newest Beanie Baby. There have been so many times I’ve thought that I need to get rid of them. They have not done anything but clutter our attic. Yet, I have never done anything with them.

The other day this amazing woman posted on her Facebook that she would love to give all of her kiddos Beanie Babies for Christmas. Rebecca is the founder of My Father’s House in Kampala, Uganda and is currently loving the kids at her ministry’s children’s home and school. So, tomorrow I will be hitting the road with these guys…


…We will be making the drive to Tennessee to meet Rebecca and give her the Beanies. I cannot tell you how excited I am to send all 109 (yes I counted) to Africa. I think it’s awesome that God is allowing me to pass along what I once treasured to 109 precious children on the other side of the world. What is even more awesome, is that My Father’s House is one of the places we will be serving with Visiting Orphans in June! You can learn more about Rebecca and her testimony here at my crazy team leader, Kari Gibson’s blog. I cannot wait to hold the hands and faces that will be receiving my Beanie Babies!
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Changed – Part 2

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Read Part 1 here.

When the doctor told my parents of the damage my brain had suffered, I of course knew none of this. My parents kept me from the grim reality. I can clearly remember the doctor visits, but that was not the scary part.
What I remember more than anything were the nights. It was at night that my fears were at their greatest. During the day I was surrounded by people. At night I was alone. Every night when it was bedtime, the terror set in. I would cry and beg my mom to stay with me until I fell asleep. I did not want to close my eyes for fear of what the night would bring. Fearful that another seizure would happen. Fearful that I would not live to see the morning.
After taking the seizure medication for some time, doctors decided to begin to ween me off of it. Shortly thereafter, I went back for more scans and tests. Doctors were baffled by what they found. All traces of brain damage were gone. There was no evidence I had ever even had a seizure.
“…and the prayer offered in faith will make the sick person well.” -James 5:15
“…for I am the Lord who heals you.” -Exodus 15:26
Jehovah Rapha had moved in me. The Mighty One had worked a miracle in me. God truly is so good.
Let me diverge from my story for a moment to make it clear that even if God had not healed me, He would STILL BE GOOD. He would still be the only Jehovah Rapha. He would still be mighty and awesome. He would still be the creator of the universe that longs for an intimate relationship with each of us and would still be so deserving of our praise.
Of course my parents were ecstatic over the doctor’s news, but I was still terrified. The memory of that Sunday still plagued me. I still cried and begged my mom not to leave me at night. I remember my mom telling me that if I had Jesus in my heart, there was nothing to fear. But I didn’t. God used my seizures to stir my heart. It was during those long nights that I came to realize I so desperately needed to be forgiven of my sins. I so desperately needed the one called Jesus to come into my heart.
When I was 13 I made a decision that changed my life forever. I prayed for God to forgive me of my sins. I prayed that He would come into my heart to stay. I promised to serve Him alone. And God was right there to answer my cry, to cleanse me.
“‘Come now, let us reason together,’ says the Lord. ‘Though your sins are like scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they are red as crimson, they shall be like wool.'” -Isaiah 1:18
God’s ways are so above our comprehension. His plan so much more magnificent than anything we could ever imagine. If before the day I was born, God had asked me to write my life story, I most certainly would not have included seizures. But I am so thankful to have had them. I now have an awesome testament of God’s glory to share with people. And after I welcomed Christ into my heart, I did not have another fearful night. I have never again been afraid to fall asleep. Fear had been replaced with peace.
“For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all.” -2 Corinthians 4:17
“‘For I know the plans I have for you,’ declares the Lord, ‘plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future.'” -Jeremiah 29:11
God had a plan to change me. He had a plan to invite me to become one of His own. And since that day almost 9 years ago, He has not stopped changing me.
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Changed – Part 1

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I don’t know how many people actually read this. I know that some of the people who do, already know this story, but this is my story. The story of how God changed me. It will come in two parts, so be patient. I created this blog as a way to share my journey and passions. It’s time I share me. It’s time I share why I am so passionate about visiting the orphan, why I never shut up about it. It’s time I share how my great, big, awesome God has worked in me. And although this is my story, it’s not about me. It’s about God. It’s Him in me.

I had what I consider to be a pretty perfect childhood. I had a mom and dad who loved me dearly. They spoiled their only child rotten. I was at church every Sunday. I knew all sorts of stories from the Bible. I was the good girl who’s biggest fault was talking too much (some may argue that to still be true!) I had everything.
One night when I was about 9 years old, I can remember my parents calling me awake. I remember being disoriented and sleepy. I did not understand why they were waking me up and making me talk to them. I did not know that their perfect little girl had had a seizure. The experience wasn’t scary for me. I really didn’t understand what was going on. We went to the doctor. They ran a couple of tests. He told us that sometimes this happens. Sometimes kids have one unexplained seizure and that’s it. After that they simply grow out of it.
Things continued normally for me after that. I did not grasp what had happened. I never thought about it again. Then, about a year later, I was sitting in church one Sunday when something went wrong. I remember sitting beside my mom, looking at my Bible, eating a peppermint. Suddenly my body went numb. I could not control anything. I tried to reach out to my mom, but my hand was drawn to my chest. I tried to cry out, but no words came out. I was a prisoner to my body. I was trapped without any control. I was having a grand mal (or tonic-clonic) seizure.
It is hard to explain to someone what it actually feels like. It is horrifying. I compare it to what I imagine some people in a coma feel like. You are aware of things around you, but it’s all sort of fuzzy. You don’t necessarily hear people, but you know they are there. Inside you are screaming for someone to make it stop, but your body is not cooperating.
When the seizure was finally over, our church family gathered around me to pray for me. When we left, well intentioned people came and asked if I was feeling better. Their good intentions angered me. What sort of question was that? I never felt “sick” to begin with. If they were referring to whether or not I felt better emotionally, of course I didn’t. I was a terrified little girl who although knew the stories of Christ, knew nothing of His peace.
The rest of that day is a blur to me, and for that I am thankful. According to my parents I had seizure, after seizure that day. My perfect life turned to fear. I underwent test after test. I was poked and scanned. I underwent CT scans, MRIs, and EEGs. I was put on medication. Because of the medication I had to go monthly to have my blood drawn.
My parents were told my brain had suffered too much damage from the seizures. I would never be the same. Their perfect little girl would never recover. I would never be able to drive, finish school, have a normal life. I was forever changed.
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This Christmas, Simply Love

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There are 58 days until Christmas! Wow!

As I began to think about what gifts to give everyone this year, I decided I want to give with a purpose. I want to give gifts that instead of just being used for a month or so, will last a lifetime. I want to give gifts that make an impact.
I began to search for organizations and families that offer opportunities to give gifts that make a difference. While I know there are many, many more out there, I have made a list of the ones I found. Will you give with a purpose this year? Within the list below there are organizations that provide for and care for those in need. There are families raising money for their adoption. Most importantly there are people who are using their time and resources to simply love.
Of course you can still purchase your Simply Love Uganda shirt or Just Love Coffee to help fund my journey to Uganda!
I have made this super easy for you. Search through the categories to find just what you are looking for. Help a family bring their baby home. Help care for the orphan and the widow. Help society to forgive, but not forget about those in prison. Help put an end to human trafficking. Help make a difference this Christmas.
(If you are a fundraising family or an organization striving to make a difference, tell me the link to your blog or website and I will gladly add you!)
Apparel
Art

Christmas

Cookbooks
Jewelry

Totes and Bags

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Psychics, Ouija Boards, and the Church

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As I write this post, I am sure there are people who disagree with me, but oh well. I know there will be some who think I’ve lost my mind when I tell you I volunteered to bring a psychic and a Ouija board to church with me.

I am a Psychology major. For one of my electives I am taking a class called X-files. X-files is the study of why people believe in the paranormal. That’s the supposed class description at least. Often I think the class is really an hour of the professor trying to convince us that nothing exists including the power of God. I say the power of God because this professor has acknowledged God exists, but that God is a distant being with little to no interaction or connection to us. It seems that not all, but a lot of students in the class would agree. So a lot of times I find myself fighting to tell these people that our God is love, lots and lots of crazy love, because I don’t think they know that amazing truth.

In our class there have been several occasions where the professor will ask who attends church. Who has a living, breathing relationship with Christ is apparently irrelevant. On two occasions that question has been followed by, “Who would take a psychic to church with them?” and “Who would take a Ouija board to church?” Our professor makes it clear that they believe every single church would either throw us out at such blasphemy or not even allow us in the first place because they would believe we were possessed by satan.

With both questions, I volunteered. Heart pounding because I know the disbelief and argument that will follow, I volunteer. Each time my professor has been astounded and unconvinced that I would actually do such a thing. They are sure no church could be that loving and accepting.

Let me be clear to say that I do not believe in psychics, Ouija boards, or the like. I do believe however that the church is supposed to be a place of love. I believe that if a church is truly following the life of Christ, a psychic in attendance one Sunday should be welcomed whole heartedly.

Maybe some disagree with me for entertaining such things that could be classified as witchcraft which the Bible teaches against. But in Matthew 9:12 Jesus says, “It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick…for I have not come to call the righteous, but sinners.” It saddens me each week when such questions come up in my class. It saddens me that we have allowed the church to be viewed as a place of judgment. Yes, one day we will all face our final judgment, but when Christ walked this earth He did not judge. He loved. It was the hypocrites and Pharisees that He dealt harshly with. But for the tax collectors, adulterers, liars, thieves, lepers, sinners…he LOVED them.

In Matthew 22:37 Jesus tells us, “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’”

So where is our love? Why do people see the church as a place of judgment? It is certainly not God’s character that has created this image.

I am not the epitome of love. I never will be this side of Heaven. I judge just as we all do. When we find ourselves judging and forgetting to love however, we must remember we are an example of Christ. Judgment and hate is not an image I want the church to be known for. I want to be the girl who’s known for hanging out with psychics, thieves, the poor, the lost and the shunned because that’s who my Jesus teaches me to be.

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Uganda Shirts!!

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Exciting news…Simply Love Uganda shirts are now for sale!!! But, before I tell you the details of the shirt I want to share some things with you about them.

At some point in my many hours of blog reading, I found Kari Gibson’s blog. She has set up a fundraiser to help families that are adopting and people going on mission trips. I contacted her and started getting everything set up for my own Simply Love fundraiser. A couple of days after our first communications, I found out that she is one of the team leaders for my trip to Uganda! Don’t you love when God brings things together like that?
Kari and her brother Michael Smalley will be leading our team to Uganda. Follow our team at http://uganda.mycrazyadoption.org/
Now without further ado, here are the shirts!



The shirts are sage green with white writing. A blue outline of Uganda is on the back, right shoulder. They are a unisex fit and super soft. Shirts are $24.95 and all proceeds will support my trip with Visiting Orphans. You can order your shirt by clicking the Paypal link on the right or if you are in the Dalton/Milledgeville area I can take cash or check from you. Once the shirts are in I can either ship it to you or bring it to you if you’re nearby!
Once you’ve ordered your shirt spread the word to friends and family. Wear your shirt to spread awareness and support. Most importantly PRAY!! Thank you all from the bottom of my heart for your love!

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Lessons

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It amazes me that no matter how many times God reveals His wisdom to me, there always seems to be some lessons I learn over and over again. I am in the second week of my senior year of college (can you say crazy!). I really want to spend this year learning more about the love of Christ so that I would be able to better spread that love to others. It has been my prayer lately that God would place people in my path to pour that love out to.

I have prayed and I have waited. Prayed and waited. Why was God not sending anyone to me? I was praying. He should have delivered.

God had been delivering every day. I was just too blind to see. I have been struggling recently to really spend personal time with God. I wasn’t spending time in God’s word like I should. I wasn’t truly seeking Him. And I know that in order for me to grow closer to God, I have to put in the effort. Yet for some reason, I always seem to have problems remembering that.

It is exactly .4 miles from my apartment to campus. This morning when I left for class I thought to grab my iPod. The first song to play was Shane and Shane’s “Heart of Servants.”

I spent the .4 miles praising my Father. Asking Him to change my heart. To make me a servant of all. Asking Him to help me surrender my pride. To release me from my selfishness. And to pour out His love through me.

When I arrived in class my teacher asked me about the shirt I was wearing. It is my adoption shirt from the Walser Family. The shirt says, “Love with abandon. Love an orphan.” So I had the opportunity to share with my teacher and rest of the class the miracle of adoption and the amount of love involved.

And there’s more. The class is called Creative Art Therapies. Today we were asked to draw a wall, of any kind. This is the wall I drew (please keep in mind that I am NOT artistically gifted).

We were then asked to explain to the class what our wall symbolized. I explained that my wall symbolized the walls that adoptive families have to fight through. That it is not an easy journey, but one that God has called them to and will guide them through. That these families must truly love with abandon to follow God’s call. I explained that it is not just families adopting, but that we are called to love all people with abandon. I explained that I chose to make my wall out of interweaving colors because at the end of their journey, the faces of these families may be many different colors, but they are all a part of God’s family.
I didn’t have an in depth conversation on theology with my class. It was just a brief time of sharing. But it was something, and I am so thankful for that chance.
God showed up. He put someone in my path. But God has shown up every day. I just haven’t taken the time to prepare my heart for when He does. I allowed myself to pass through the day blinded to the opportunities all around me. But oh the difference a morning of praise makes.
Lamentations 3:22-23 reads, “Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.”

God’s compassions are new EVERY MORNING. So no matter what kind of day I’m having when I wake up or what trials I am facing, I have something to praise Him for.

I know I will probably learn this lesson all over again at some point. But I am thankful for the lesson today. I am thankful that God loves me regardless of the amount of effort I put forth. I am thankful that God doesn’t love you more than me or me more than you. I am thankful that God loves ALL of me. I am thankful that He wants all of me.
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Junk Posse Necklace!!!

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Ok so I know most of you reading my blog have no idea what I am talking about. I had never heard of Junk Posse either until a couple of months ago. But then I found these wonderful families who are in the process of adopting and they lead me to Junk Posse. Tracy is the woman behind Junk Posse. She creates wonderful pieces of jewelry that speak up for the orphan. You should definitely check our her store here. She has tons of pieces to choose from and each one supports a non-profit organization or adopting family. Right now 30% of every purchase that is not already designated to a family or organization, will help support the Shubin Family. Read their story here.

I had Tracy create a custom piece for me. Believe me when I say I have been counting down the days for it to arrive. Well it came today, and I absolutely LOVE it!!

The back square pendant has James 1:27 written on it, “Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world.” The front oval pendant has the word “LOVE”.

I am so excited to wear this piece. I want it to be a reminder of my purpose over the coming months as I prepare to go to Uganda. May I always remember throughout every trial, that our greatest calling is simply to love.

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Coffee for Sale!!

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Fundraiser #1 is officially underway! You can now purchase coffee, t-shirts, mugs, hats, etc. to support my journey to Uganda at JustLoveCoffee. There are tons of coffees available and $5 from every purchase will support my trip to Africa! You can also join the “2 Buy 2 Club” so you will receive coffee every month. So spread the word and buy some coffee!!